Dear Agony Aunt,
It was 'that' day on Monday.
The day that has become all about how many cards, flowers, chocolates are received. There was not a single card in sight, not even from my lovely child and don't even get me started on the very obvious lack of roses. This had been a very bleak day and traditionally for me, it has always been a day that I have dreaded.
During my teenage years, my relationships (and I use the term loosely) would typically begin just after or end just before Valentine's Day.
I was never very popular in Secondary school, or when I was doing my A'levels and college was certainly no better. Even during my marriage, it felt like I had to hint at the possibility of my 'man' giving me a token of their affection.
It is the thing that seems to have alluded me for most of my life, so far, along with the reason why it carries so much gravitas in my mind.
Last year, DC gave me two roses. He chose a red for our "passion" and a white for me. But this year was different. I'm almost certain that we're not seeing each other anymore, as he is spending most of his week days out of London working and at weekends, he is up north taking care of his elderly mother.
Last year, DC gave me two roses. He chose a red for our "passion" and a white for me. But this year was different. I'm almost certain that we're not seeing each other anymore, as he is spending most of his week days out of London working and at weekends, he is up north taking care of his elderly mother.
There is no time for me.
So the reality for me, is that Valentine's Day has become a bit like New Year's Eve, where it is geared up to be spent with a loved one.
Giving me a sense of social exclusion, not a nice feeling at all.
Giving me a sense of social exclusion, not a nice feeling at all.
Will this ever change?
Is there someone out there that would put me nearer the top of their priority list?
I bloody well hope so.
Sincerely,
'trying to remain optimistic' in North London
Oh Lulu. I feel for you. Two shitty 'couple' holidays so close together. Plus I could knock DCs block off.
ReplyDeleteWe really ought to try a free month of Guardian Soulmates...really, you never know who you might meet...
You're lovely and sexy and beautiful and funny and the kindest, most thoughtful person I have ever met. You deserve the absolute best. You always have. It will come to you, I know it will. And I will rejoice longer and louder than anyone else when it does. xxxxx
Reading this Lulu makes me so sad.
ReplyDeleteBut do you know what, the grass isn't always greener. Not everyone 'does' valentines. I've been married for nearly 10 years, together for 10 before that (and no I'm not really old!) and the most romantic thing my (then) boyfriend did for me was to buy me a kettle because he knew I really needed one!
You never know what the future holds, so hang tough. And remember kettles are just as important as roses! x
we never do much on Valentines Day either. We buy one another a card from the dollar store, and dh gets me a couple of scratch and win tickets from the garage.
ReplyDeleteWhy, just because I guess.
Maybe next year will be better?
Gill in Canada
Nicola - thank you darling.
ReplyDeleteTara - I'd take a new kettle and thank you for the reality check. :-)
Gill - I keep telling myself that I'm a glass half full sort of person, so yes, next year will be better.